Why Conversations about Sex Shouldn't Be Avoided

Inspired by a group consultation meeting, all our staff therapists agreed that conversations about sex are better had now rather than later.

It's important to normalize talking about sex & intimacy in your relationship for many reasons. 

Talking about sex is just as important as having sex. Whether you're scheduling times to get busy, expressing your desire, mentioning things getting in the way of sex- all sex-related topics are relevant. It helps you express what you want and creates language to build a mutual understanding between you and your partner. If you feel uncomfortable talking about it openly and honestly with a partner then it will be difficult to share your desires or disclose when there are concerns. "Talking about sex can feel awkward for a lot of couples—whether they’re having a perfectly healthy sex relationship or not. Experts say that communicating can help prevent problems or stop them from getting worse." (Chavez, 2019)

These conversations don’t have to happen in the bedroom. In fact, these conversations can happen over a cup of tea, on a walk, after the kids go to school, etc.

Here are some questions to ask yourself going into the conversation:

1. What is the goal of this conversation? Do we share the same goal?

2. What feelings come up when talking about sex to my partner?

3. How can I be present and hear what my partner has to say with curiosity and avoiding judgement?

Intimacy requires mutual vulnerability, openness, and sharing. 

Not to mention, a healthy intimate & sexual relationship has a ton of health benefits!